Lately I’ve been having a similar conversation with friends and family I haven’t seen in awhile. They mention that they’ve been keeping up with me on this here blog and on social media. They then insert some comment about how well they perceive my life to be going. While I know I live a more charmed life than many, I feel the need to remind these people that what I share on the blog and social media is far from everything.
I have always strived to show a realistic view of my life and fitness journey with my signature touch of sarcasm and sass. I’m not afraid to talk about my struggle with being awkward, how much job hunting sucks or the totally unsexy side of marathon training. No matter how open I am about my personality flaws or bodily fluids, it’s impossible to truly capture all aspects and facets of my life on the interwebs.
I find myself frequently scrolling through instagram and Facebook comparing my life to the life of others I see on the internet. I lust after the social media lives of full time bloggers. People my age that are getting engaged or moving in with their significant other. People that have a job I think I desperately want. People with apartments that are perfectly decorated and spotless. I get filled with this gross sense of jealousy because these people’s lives seem perfect and they are living the dream, so to speak. I find myself wanting their life, this curated life I’m seeing thanks to their internet persona and social media.
We all share mostly good things on social media. The exciting job announcements, the engagements, the fun parts of our job. What none of us seem to share in a fully unedited way is the not so shiny parts of life. The boring parts of my job don’t make for interesting snapchat stories. The unattractive photos don’t make it to instagram. The meltdowns, anxiety attacks and ugly moments don’t always make for good blog posts.
I won’t pretend that things have been perfect lately. I have no idea what the hell I want to do with my life and I wish it was acceptable to have someone else tell me what my dream job is, or at the very least how I can make money doing what I enjoy doing. I’m caught in this vicious cycle of job hunting every year and it’s exhausting. I rarely feel lonely even though I’ve lived alone for 5+ years, but lately I’ve been feeling lonely since I’m not working full time and have been spending more time than usual by myself with free time.
These kinds of thoughts and feelings don’t always make their way to the blog and instagram, but it doesn’t mean they don’t exist for me, and probably anyone else you see on social media.
If you’re like me and find yourself lusting after someone else’s internet life, remember that chances are you’re not seeing the whole, unfiltered, picture.
Question: How do you avoid the social media comparison trap?
Oh girl, I get it more than you realize on every single one of these fronts. (And actually am about to publish a similar post.) Run/coffee chat soon?
Always assuring to hear others feel this way. Coffee chat soon would be lovely
This is something that I’ve been thinking about a lot recently. I spend a lot of time on different social media accounts, searching for new blogs & inspiration, but I find myself comparing a lot. When that happens, I try to take a step back and do something that focuses on me, whether its reading a book, going for a run, etc.
P.S. I love your blog! I stumbled upon it a couple of weeks ago, and I’ve been browsing through your posts periodically. My favorite is your marathon recap 🙂
Thanks so much for stopping by– fellow NYU alum over here! I love that, getting back to something that focuses on me as opposed to comparing.
Love this so much! Thanks for being so authentic and real.
Thank you so much, and thank you for the brilliant career advice on your blog, I’m obsessed.
I love this – it’s so important to remember! And as someone who is all about finding the perfect Instagram filter and highlighting all the delicious and nutritious food I eat and the long runs I go on – I think it’s important to remind the people out there following along that that is not like 24/7! Thanks for posting.
It’s so true– my food doesn’t always look “staged” or even remotely pretty.
I can totally relate to this post and thank you for being so honest on your blog! It’s definitely important to remember that you have no idea what’s going on behind all the perfect Instagram images and that it’s unlikely that anyone’s life is as perfect as it may seem on social media.
Thanks Amanda!
I feel like I got pretty lucky re: the comparison trap because working in social media and having friends who are influencers, I know how much planning and work goes into many of the posts you see. That said, I will look at an outfit/place and wish I had some of the pieces shown or was on X beach. I think it’s also important to remember the analog version of this and remind yourself that “even the girl in the magazine doesn’t look like the girl in the magazine.” When all else fails, throw on some Biebs and Fetty Wap, add in additional pop and maybe Demo Lovato “Cool for the Summer” and have a crazy dance party.